It was a bittersweet experience when visiting Mom in Kansas City. She is suffering from Lewy Body Dementia (LBD). I didn’t know if Mom recognized me or what she was feeling or thinking. I tried to put myself in her position, and if she could communicate, this is what I imagined her saying.
Message from Mom:
I used to be the Mom of this family. LBD is in charge of my body and mind and has turned me into an infant. Now I’m the baby of the family.
My daughter, Pat, spoon-feeds me what suspiciously looks like baby food, sweet potatoes whirled in a blender.
My son, Tom, bundles me in a blanket and walks me around the neighborhood in a wheelchair that looks like a stroller.
My daughter, Denise, spreads my youthful Irish face with lotion and applies lipstick.
My daughter, Kate from Denver, repeatedly says in a loud voice, “Mom, this is Kate, your oldest daughter.” I am not deaf, but everyone talks to me as though I am.
The "hired help" change my diapers and bathe me.
My words come out like baby talk as they struggle to understand. It is easier to remain quiet, but sometimes I articulate a five-word lucid sentence, and everyone is surprised.
“They came out real cute,” I utter when shown a photo of my grandchildren.
“We need a professional here,” when my daughter, who is not a beautician, attempts to cut my hair.
All my kids try to get a laugh or a smile out of me, their former Mom. I’m no longer the Mom but the baby of the family. I must now rely on them to mother me.
Related Resource:
Book: Mothering Mother by Carol O’Dell
One of my favorite books is "Tuesdays with Morrie". I read this right at the same time that I reconnected with a friend who is severely disabled. It really helped me to see things from a different perspective. I certainly hope that I can be as gracious as Morrie if I ever need that much assistance. This is lovely, Kate!
Posted by: terri reinhart | September 22, 2008 at 02:45 AM
Im a big fan here, hope to see some new editions.
Posted by: kratom powder | January 06, 2011 at 04:28 AM